First cut off the head
By kaldor
First cut off the head, and unseal the eye – pop out the eyeballs and set aside
Saw off half of each leg
Slice through the belly, make a slit between the hind legs, and pull out the guts (keeping in mind that the animal has two stomachs, two livers, a spleen, and only one lung)
Extract the kidneys and scoop out the bile gland
Wash the organ meat in mercy’s sugared milk and hang it in a cool place (remembering that sooner or later it will have to be faced)
This is an ancient Scottish recipe, and the recognised and accepted lack of a Scottish culinary imagination may compel you to look for alternatives, but if the following conditions are not fulfilled, the dish will not be authentic. Upon your own head be it
Put the pinhead oatmeal in a large basin, and add half the sugar, salt, dripping, gelatine, treacle syrup and a sprinkling of borax
Mix by hand, using only long circular movements, adding the water judiciously to avoid the predominance of the cohesionless material (the determination of the friability of the stuffing mix is an empirical and approximate method)
Leave to stand
Distract yourself by repeating the following, ad infinitum: “I know nothing about cooking but I know what I like”
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I thought I might stimulate Kaldor to explain why he has left the organ meat hanging in a cool place?
There has to be more to his skills than to leave us also hanging while he carry’s on muttering ad infinitum………. like a Virgin being led to the Bridal Bed !!……….
nothing to be grumpy about here if the feast is half as good as described
by mikerosenberg on 13th January 2012The deadline is approaching for the Beast only 12 days left to reveal all, and allow each and everyone to participate in a fine drinking/gastronomical bonanza that leaves us in awe
of the mighty power that watches over us.
I hope soon we will be introduced to the final preparation ?
which I understand is an exacting and pain-staking process that requires a precision only achieved after consuming large quantities of the finest Malt and the singing of the “National Anthem” both versions…………..
Each step to be accompanied by a dram of malt.
Thrust an open pit roasting skewer up the beasts arse so that it comes out between the
front legs.
That’s the second course accounted for,
While the Holy mixture is standing don’t forget to put a heavy curling stone on it as added security against the thieving sassenach fairies that abound on these auspicious occasions
Prayers will be said and malt will be imbibed.
by thegrumpycook on 6th December 2011What no Garlic??
by mikerosenberg on 6th December 2011
